Hello Everyone,



I know it’s been some time since you have heard from me. I have to say the last few months have been crazy. The last year and ½ have been the most challenging as I continue to battle this thing called cancer. Well, today is my birthday and I am proud to say that I have made another trip around the sun!


The last 3-4 months have been particularly challenging. I have been in and out of the ER for various symptoms related to the cancer treatment. If that was not enough I have had my hours at work reduced. I was able to pick up a second part time position going back to my old standby as a home health care nurse. That was very taxing on me physically not to mention how insanely hot it was this summer! I managed through as I continued to battle the different symptoms of the cancer treatments and the disappointment of the incline of my cancer count.


Back in April I had had great success with one medication called Avasitn cutting my cancer count in half in one treatment. Unfortunately it caused a severe hypertensive crisis and me ending up in the chest pain clinic. So I was taken off of that medication and but on Topecin which had very little effect.


I trudged along at my jobs and chemo being frustrated with both but determined to continue and not be defeated when everything came to a screeching halt in one week. Just three weeks ago I was offered a full time position within my dept as a case manager. Perfect! Just what I was looking for. I could quit the other 2 jobs and work just one and finally pay the bills. By the end of the last week as I was finishing up my job at Patewood I was awoken at 4am with excruciating pain in my lower abdomen. Here I was Friday 3 weeks ago finishing one job and getting ready to start the new job on Monday and I was admitted into the hospital for pain management. The doctor stated he wanted to discuss other options as well. What did that mean? Could I and would I be able to start my new job I had no idea.

While in the hospital I was told my cancer count had sky rocketed to over 700. Normal is 35 or below. The tumors in my abdomen were growing and now visible for the first time on the cat scan. Not good. This would explain my pain. So Dr. Puls’ plan was to transition me from IV pain meds to oral pain meds to manage my symptoms. Holding back tears I asked how I was going to start my new job with all this going on. Calmly he said,


“You just do what you normally would do.”

Those words resonated with me strongly because that is just what I was doing so I continued on. If you don’t believe God is not planning these things out I have news for you. It seems everything came together that weekend. Tue I started my new job. Wed I saw Dr Puls again and he agreed with the help of my primary Dr to put me back on the Avastin. My primary would be watching my blood pressure to keep it in check. I also started back on the carboplatin. I had been on before with great success before but I had to wait a year to go back on it and wouldn’t you know its been a year! These two medications separately worked well for me so together they should bring great results! If that wasn’t enough for the first time I am able to get my chemo every 3 weeks not 2 -3 times a month like before. Which works out perfect for the new job.

Everything came together God had been slowly orchestrating each aspect of my life to bring everything harmoniously together. I know I could not do better it just amazes me how he works. It seemed as though my many months of rain and my glimmer of hope from the “son” brought together a beautiful rainbow I could not begin to imagine.

My job is going well, my chemo treatment is going well, I take very little pain medicine and next week we find out where my cancer count is. I feel very positive about this. No matter what Dr. Puls says on Wednesday I’m not worried I know I am in God’s hands and he’s got it under control. Thanks for all your love and support. It makes the world of difference.


Remember without both the rain and sun we would not have a rainbow and with everything it’s all in how WE make it!






Lots of love and thanks for so much support!


Tricia

My first blog..oh my goodness!

 Okay so here it is my very first blog. I can't believe I'm doing this but I have to say I'm very excited about it. I have been asked by many people to tell them more about my journey with cancer and how God is working in my life. It has been an honor to be asked to do so but, honestly, I really didn't want to talk about the cancer. I don't want to make it the center of my life. Undeniably it has become a very significant part of my life but I'm trying not to make it the center. So here it goes a little about the cancer, a lot about my walk with God all mixed together with a little "Trish humor" to liven it up. We don't want this to become one of those gift card commercials where we're crying with the tissue box after only 30 seconds of reading. Life is hard enough this is about laughing while we get chemotherapy just so the person sitting next to you will smile through their own nervousness.


First a disclaimer: I am a nurse. I admit I have terrible grammar and spelling. Writing notes on patients is a lot different than a blog. It’s quick, fast, dirty and to the point. Okay maybe not so different but please excuse the occasional mis-spell or lost coma. There seems to be no spell check with this either so I will do my best.

PLEASE STAND BY FOR TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES..........

Sorry about that. That is how far I would have gotten yesterday had I not been interrupted so rudely by the fact that I could not breathe. You see I was getting my new chemo, Doxil. All was going well I had gotten my pre-meds and was set up in my chemo lounge chair with computer in hand, purple prayer shawl loving wrapped around my shoulders and diet coke on my side table as the strange orangie-red, kool-aid looking substance dripped into me. After a few minutes I started to feel nauseated and began to think the Wendy's Jr cheeseburger for lunch was not such a good idea. This was quickly followed by a strong pressure on my chest, swelling to my neck and face which was now bright red and an intense pain to my lower back. What breath I could find I yelled out to my nurse who came running over followed by a gaggle of at least a half a dozen more. I was going into anaphylactic shock. For those non-medicals I was having a very bad allergic reaction, I could not breathe. Now here’s the best part after stopping the infusion and getting me loaded up on steroids, oxygen and Benadryl the doctor covering for my doctor asked me,

       "Would you like to try that again, we'll slow down the rate and watch you very carefully?"

The wonders of modern medicine. Yes, he really did ask this and yes this IS normal practice. So we did and after 25 minutes once again, this time in major slow motion, it happened again. So what did the doctor say next?

      "I guess you’re allergic to Doxil, we can rule that one out."

Really, I want to try it again. Three strikes then you’re out! In the literature for Doxil which I read at least a hundred times stated only 1% of the patients that receive this medicine will have an allergic reaction. Congratulations you have just met the 1%!  Oh, my goodness, you just don't know.

So it appears that my very first blog NOT about cancer has become just that. But wait there’s more. I felt so much of God's presence with me. The nurses took very good care of me. My reaction did not last long and was not detrimental. The doctor was patient, attentive and understanding (even if he was a little slow about me being allergic to Doxil). I came through it just fine. I am concerned with what treatment is next for me and what lovely side effects I will get to look forward to. I am learning to be patient and wait and trust in God. I am also learning to trust my doctor. You would think after 34 years of having arthritis and 15 years of being a nurse it would be second nature for me follow my doctors’ lead. Guess again. This day I wanted nothing more than to follow him. The doctor covering for him gave me an option. For the first time (surprise to some of you) I had no opinion. I wanted to know what Dr. Puls wanted to do. This is a big step for me and if this little episode taught me just this, what a great lesson.

As I have said I don’t know what’s next with my treatment this I do know. I have to pay taxes, I will someday die and God knows what he is doing he has it all planned out-plans to take care of me, not abandon me, plans to give me the future I hope for. When I call on him, when I come and pray to him, he always listens, he is always with me.

Cancer has given me new glasses. I have always said, “I’ll do it when the storm passes, when I get off of work, when the debts are paid and the weight is lost.”

My cancer glasses are teaching me to dance in the rain, its okay to leave work early, the debt and the weight will come off on their time. It’s now time to enjoy the climb not focus on what’s on top of the mountain.

So my friends that is all my infinite wisdom for my first blog. Hopefully it will get better. Next time you see a puddle jump in with your good shoes on! We only have so much time here, so let’s enjoy the climb!